If You Can Make It There, You'll Make It Anywhere

I just returned home to Memphis after spending a long weekend in NYC and I'm back on a New York Kick. I actually don't know if I was never NOT on this kick; I have always had very strong feelings towards The Big City. I guess I can call New York my home, though I have lived in a lot of different places throughout my life. It's the place where I feel that I have truly grown up and the one place that I had always dreamed of living. I moved there on my own, barely knowing anyone and made it work.

Bethesda Fountain, Central Park

view from Top of the Rock

I could go on and on about my first 5 years in New York City. I lived in 4 different apartments (in the West Village, the Upper East Side, West Harlem, and the Upper West Side) I worked at two different jobs (not at the same time) and was working on my Masters when the whole brain thing unexpectedly went down. I made so many friends, met my (now) husband, and found my own little nook in such a big city. New York is a bitch of a city; it's harsh, unforgiving, inconvenient, fast, expensive, and all around difficult. It's also incredibly convenient, beautiful, unique, diverse, eclectic, tolerant, offers every opportunity you can ever imagine, and is all around magical.  I always said that when I left, I would miss everything that I hated about the city, which is valid, so when I think of things I love it makes my heart hurt. When I am not there, I ache for New York. I have mentioned that after my injury, moving back was the best decision I could have made and that statement is 100% true.

view from my first UWS apt

I needed to become independent again, and the best way for me to do that was to move back to somewhere that I was familiar with and had a good support group. The driving factor (if you will) was the fact that I didn't have to drive AT ALL to function normally. I moved back to a quiet street on the Upper West Side, and I swear God knew the move was right as I somehow moved into a studio on the ground floor of a building where I used 0 stairs (this is NOT normal in NYC; the apartment I had lived in before I got sick was a 5th floor walk-up). I joined a gym that became another little community for me as I got to know everyone in there, got to know the people at my little deli across the street, the people in the laundromat, the grocery store etc. I had never felt more at home there. That doesn't mean that there weren't times that were extremely hard and incredibly trying. There were nights that I would just bawl my eyes out, or sometimes I would just feel incredibly lonely. BUT New York healed me in so many ways.

Me walking Across the Brooklyn Bridge

I re-developed my independence; I traveled anywhere I wanted whenever I wanted, I carried laundry and groceries; and I maintained my little apartment.  I was able to walk in my funny way down the street and no one cared because, as a lady in a nail salon told me, "It's New York; everyone walks funny." Though the one problem is that sometimes at night, because of how I walked, cab drivers would think I was really drunk and not let me in the cab.

Yay for public transportation!

my old gym

I was able to experience New York the way I wanted to and appreciated every day I had there. When I was there I knew I was supposed to be there, and I can't even explain how much I miss it now. Nope, New York City is not for everyone; as I said, it's a city that will chew you up and spit you out, but it's my home, and believe me, if a girl with a brain injury can make it there, anyone can.